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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Sat Jun 30, 2007 4:04 pm |
 Post subject: yes, another love thread. |
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Wounds from a friend are faithful,
but an enemy multiplies kisses.
Proverbs 27:6
this is about intimacy. physical intimacy... about the way i see it, the ways in which it seems to fail, and the ways in which it seems to succeed.
this isn't so much about love, but it has its links.
say we have a girl that's always been told she's not pretty. alot of the time, she'll take one of two options, take it on the chest, and believe it; or she can go out into the world to try and prove 'them' wrong. world, when have we ever heard, 'you're beautiful', from someone other than your partner? it's alot easier to say i love you to someone who's already in love (or lust) with you. so when our insecure little damsel goes out to prove them wrong, she goes out for love, she takes all the things God has given her and uses them against her fellow man. she seduces him, uses him, and then when she finds that her insecurities are still insecurities, she denies him. she denies him and moves on to the next victim. it really boils down to theft, a grand emotional robbery, and because the woman fails to accept the truth of her beauty there's no emotional satisfaction for her, even in dozens of less-than-great men, and rarely in a good man.
when is a kiss suitable? back in christ's day a kiss signified deep friendship, and because of this, nowadays, i wouldn't reject a kiss on the cheek from many of my friends. then you have the hug, which is also suitable between friends, i feel. displays of affection other that these belong in the 'lust' category. it's pretty clearly split down the middle. so we have two sides of a busy street, lust on one side, friendship on the other, and heaven help the man (or woman) that finds himself stranded in the middle. he's gotta choose where he wants to be, and the traffic is going both ways. he gets confused, afraid, unsure, and the longer he stays in the middle the worse off he is. maybe he will even choose to get off the road altogether, and a friendship is ruined leaving nothing but waste and hatred.
this is perhaps why becky didn't want ben. why jessie didn't want chris. why so many friendships don't want to turn into relationships. the U-turn from philia to eros is difficult and dangerous.
but yeah... what about when it happens 'by accident'? two friends of opposite preference find themselves in each other's mouths, and the next day no-one knows what to do about it. for metaphor's sake, we'll turn affection into hostility. two nations at cold war, they spy on each other, and eventually one nation shoots down a spyplane, the other blows up the AA unit responsible, and with each blow traded the momentum towards all-out nuclear slaughter increases unless someone says, "that's it, i can see where this is going, and i don't want to take it any further." until someone makes an assertive move to prevent the intensification of hostility, it increases. so it is with affection. it starts with a hug, then a friendly kiss, each party replying and increasing the intensity until we have a broken relationship with complimentary child-support payments. unless someone realises what's at stake (total nuclear devastation), and just says "STOP!" when our nations are the two people mentioned above, the insecure girl and the confused boy, the 'stop' button never even gets a look-in.
alot of you will know where this is coming from, some may be able to work it out. to those who don't, i apologise for not being more open... this post comes from the heart, it's not a pitiful attempt at reviving thoih, it's me crying out for us all to take a look at ourselves to see whether we're at risk, to see what's at stake... some will see what i almost lost. but yeah, i'll leave it there. |
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That Guy
Joined: 31 May 2007
Posts: 821
Sat Jun 30, 2007 6:40 pm |
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lol i gave you that one grr :p happy it helped:)
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SilverSnake...
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 3785
Location: Border City
Sat Jun 30, 2007 7:31 pm |
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I think you're ignoring one vital part of it. What if it works out. What if the poor bastard in the middle of the road decides to Mann up~! and the two end up in a relationship. Well what if that relationship turns out to be the right thing? What if it lasts?
Circumstances are different for everyone, but you've gotta remember that it might actually work out in the end.
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That Guy
Joined: 31 May 2007
Posts: 821
Sat Jun 30, 2007 7:57 pm |
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excactly ! but it could aslo not work out and 2 people get crushed thats why people stand in the middle for so long trying to work it out but they cant ive trieds its too hard :p
so i just gave up and let sleeping dogs lie :p
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Ads
gtfo - cc
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3778
Location: Wherever the voices tell me.
Sat Jun 30, 2007 9:09 pm |
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Isn't that an important aspect of life? We're all familiar with the term "sitting on the fence", we all make decisions in our life. Some of these decisions may be found unjust, but ultimately we always choose which side of the street to walk on. Some choose lustful and seemingly undignified one whilst others choose friendship. I think all of you know the situation that I'm in with my parents, but they were bickering last night and I told them to sit down and shut up for 1 minute and draw the line between appropriate and inappropriate.
I think I can link that to this thread here, we have to draw the line of where abouts we want to stand/lean/walk, what side of the street, what side of the fence. But like I said some people choose their sides unjustly, just like this "girl" in your original post (elliot). I'm a bit hazy about your original post because I dont actually know the situation.
But I guess in the end all we have to do is trust that we're making the right decision, take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself, "is this the right thing to be doing" or something along the lines. Or if you can't even be honest to yourself, man up and ask a friend.
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♥ yσυ fσґєvєґ вăвy
Burn the Wich!
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Jr W
SilverSnake...
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 3785
Location: Border City
Sat Jun 30, 2007 9:34 pm |
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You can be wrong a million times, but once you're right there is no wrong.
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"Knowledge is power, so everybody download some more eBooks" - WBB
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Sun Jul 01, 2007 1:17 am |
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well... chris i understand where you're coming from, and alot of the time i'm a pretty keen supporter of optimism, so if i have a fifty-fifty chance of either a successful (read: you win a letter from the PM on your 50th wedding anniversary) romantic relationship, or a failed friendship, i'd take the letter from the PM.
but it's not as simple as that, considering that 50% would be a bloody good divorce rate, in reality your chances of getting from the fence to the PM's letter might be closer to around say, 3%.
but adam, i like where you're coming from.
| Quote: | | But like I said some people choose their sides unjustly, just like this "girl" in your original post |
yeah, that's sort of what this is about, what justifies a lane change/fence hop, but to make a bit more sense of the intended scenario:
| Quote: | | But I guess in the end all we have to do is trust that we're making the right decision, take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself, "is this the right thing to be doing" or something along the lines. Or if you can't even be honest to yourself, man up and ask a friend. |
in my original post, a asked about what it means when the situation comes about 'by accident'. this paragraph is vital, though i might've clarified it a little, i guess what i meant to say with that was more, 'when affection between would-be friends intensifies suddenly in the heat of the moment'. no time to really make a decision, unless you've both previously made a very strong commitment to the friendship, a non-affection pact. i think you should read over the 'by accident' paragraph in the original post again.
| Robbie wrote: | | let sleeping dogs lie |
maybe next time, aye robbie? yeah, that goes for the two of us. |
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That Guy
Joined: 31 May 2007
Posts: 821
Sun Jul 01, 2007 11:19 am |
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so you are going to try and work it out with this so called girl ?
but its a bit stupid though we can only help people to an extent even if you have loved fifty people and gotten your heart broken 50 times you will never find anyone in the whole world that went through the same situation same with going through it we dont know alll of the little deatails and resons for this is happening for this reson blah blah blah the truth is we dont know .
and i donno i think next time i will persue it i did that last time but hey
were just teenagers except elliot yes a resposible young man that carries hatchets in his bag :p
but that dosent mean we should try because being their for a friend giving him someone to talk to is good for them it will help them get sorted out im saying even though you might not know anything about it help em anyway
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Tue Jul 03, 2007 10:42 am |
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| yeah, i've always thought that friends are more valuable than just about anything, but, well, when our insecure girl's welfare is concerned, it seems pretty obvious that she needs a good solid friend before another guy that'll just mess things up even more. and i'd say that the last thing she needs is a friend that's stuck in the middle and is confused to poo. |
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That Guy
Joined: 31 May 2007
Posts: 821
Wed Jul 04, 2007 1:29 pm |
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hehe exactly!
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gtfo - cc
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3778
Location: Wherever the voices tell me.
Thu Jul 05, 2007 8:54 pm |
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Sometimes a nice steady, stable relationship may be exactly what the person needs? Someone who is willing to take care of her, someone who is willing to help her get things back onto the rails, someone who makes her secure?
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♥ yσυ fσґєvєґ вăвy
Burn the Wich!
Compatible tongues
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Shara
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 436
Tue Sep 04, 2007 9:25 pm |
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| I think that for most of the time the mind should shut up and let the heart do all the talking. |
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Tue Sep 04, 2007 10:23 pm |
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| yes, but once you shut the mind up the heart often gets drowned out by the raging tantrums of the doodle. |
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Shara
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 436
Wed Sep 05, 2007 6:20 pm |
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| Only if your male. |
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gtfo - cc
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3778
Location: Wherever the voices tell me.
Wed Sep 05, 2007 6:52 pm |
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| dosthecat wrote: | | yes, but once you shut the mind up the heart often gets drowned out by the raging tantrums of the doodle. |
Until that happens to you, maybe you shouldnt' go saying things like that?
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♥ yσυ fσґєvєґ вăвy
Burn the Wich!
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Wed Sep 05, 2007 7:01 pm |
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maybe you shouldn't assume that it hasn't happened to me?
adam, here's a tip. when i talk about relationships getting caught up in the physical, and people that confuse infatuation with love i'm probably not talking about you and debbie. you're not a victim, and i have nothing but the greatest respect for what you and debbie have, but you need to realise that not everyone has experienced what you and debbie have. at this age it's rare, and in many cases it's the exception, so in conversation i treat it as such, as something rare and special. |
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gtfo - cc
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3778
Location: Wherever the voices tell me.
Wed Sep 05, 2007 7:06 pm |
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Hey, I'm sorry, that wasn't a personal attack or a flame or anything. I'm not sure how many people are so sexually explicit, it's just annoying when you hear people say "all boys are like that" etc. Obviously we do see some people out there like that, but from what I see, it only seems to be the minority, as always, screws it up for everyone else.
I'm sorry man... I shouldn't have jumped like that.
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♥ yσυ fσґєvєґ вăвy
Burn the Wich!
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Mr Mittens
Moderator
Joined: 02 Jun 2006
Posts: 1500
Location: Ireland
Wed Sep 05, 2007 7:25 pm |
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| Shara wrote: | | Only if your male. |
... not quite
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SilverSnake...
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 3785
Location: Border City
Wed Sep 05, 2007 7:51 pm |
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JAPANESE FATMAN LOVE~!
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Shara
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 436
Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:06 pm |
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| Well, as a general rule females don't have doodles, and if they do they're hermaphrodites |
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Mr Mittens
Moderator
Joined: 02 Jun 2006
Posts: 1500
Location: Ireland
Wed Sep 05, 2007 8:11 pm |
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| Shara wrote: | | Well, as a general rule females don't have doodles, and if they do they're hermaphrodites |
rofl, touche'
The site where my avatar was from closed down 
I've had it from the beginning... but I had to change my avatar
So why are we agreeing about love? This is different...
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Little Jess
Joined: 05 Sep 2007
Posts: 201
Location: We have locations now?!
Fri Sep 07, 2007 9:30 am |
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| Quote: | | Well, as a general rule females don't have doodles, and if they do they're hermaphrodites |
You don't need a doodle to think with it o.O
I'm sure alot of girls would argue that
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Shara
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 436
Fri Sep 07, 2007 12:12 pm |
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| I think we've sort of got off the point, it doesn't matter if you have a doodle or not. |
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gtfo - cc
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3778
Location: Wherever the voices tell me.
Fri Sep 07, 2007 4:23 pm |
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I'm sure if you had one, you would realise that it does matter.
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♥ yσυ fσґєvєґ вăвy
Burn the Wich!
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Shara
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 436
Fri Sep 07, 2007 11:02 pm |
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| Maybe, but the topic is "love", not "Letter to My Penis". |
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Fri Sep 07, 2007 11:52 pm |
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"letter to my penis"
rofl, where do i get the ringtone? |
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Deanman
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 224
Location: Ipswich
Wed Sep 26, 2007 11:35 am |
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I forget where I got this quote, but meh, it's the quote that counts:
We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.
Ta-Dah, Dean says something on the topic of love... hell must be freezing over.
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Sing like nobody's listening, dance like nobody's watching, work like you don't need the money, JACK OFF LIKE NOBODY'S HOME!!! |
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
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Location: Ippie, QLD
Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:41 pm |
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| sounds like someone i know... |
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Deanman
Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 224
Location: Ipswich
Fri Sep 28, 2007 8:44 am |
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What does? Who does?
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Fri Sep 28, 2007 9:29 pm |
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| hm, guess i'll have to find somewhere else to dump my pearls. |
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