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LastElf
Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 482
Location: Boovle
Sun Jun 03, 2007 10:15 pm |
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| Quote: | | It's so.. unbelievably simple. |
Too true, it's that simple that a child can do it, and I think what most people find hard is that you have to lower yourself to that of a child.
That came out of a book, can you tell? 
| Quote: | | I'd rather live my whole life like God is real and find out He isn't.. then live my whole life like God isn't real and find out He is. |
That's something I keep telling myself when doubt comes. Even if there's no one out there then I can still be the best person I can be in this life. Setting an example to the world. God or not, I can still be a role-model to the people around me.
Great post  |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 7:44 am |
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| Heh, sounded much better in my head. |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 3:12 pm |
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Not in the best mood today. I'm not even sure why. Just a little sad.  |
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Mon Jun 04, 2007 3:20 pm |
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you're not in the best mood... maybe if you could've seen the smiles on everyone when they read that other post.
i smiled... |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 3:32 pm |
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which other post was that?  |
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Mon Jun 04, 2007 4:30 pm |
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| Quote: | 3 June
Mood: / <- ha, opposites much?
Tonight was fantastic. |
that one... *smiles again* |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 4:42 pm |
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| it wasn't that good... was it? |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 5:09 pm |
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Anyway, second (bloggish) post of the day. sorry for spamming up my blog.
During the time that I've been a Christian, I've always wanted to see something huge happen, involving me. Don't get me wrong, everything happening with everyone else is AMAZING, I am not doubting that. But.. I've wanted to do something.. something that will get someone saved. I just want to get involved, and I don't know what I'm meant to do. I just feel I could be of more use then sitting here wondering about it, you know? I want to do something.. anything.
Now, the internet isn't the best place for it. The blog I wrote yesterday.. when I was writing it, tears were welling up in my eyes and my thoughts were on one person, that I was hoping it would make some effect. It might have, may not have, thats another problem of the internet. No one can SEE you, the real emotion that sometimes goes into it, and it will just pass off for another post. And if it does even make a dint in what another person is thinking.. how are you even meant to know? No one says "OH MI GOSH OH MI GOSH I READ YOUR POST AND BURST INTO TEARS LOL!"
I just wish.. pray.. that something I would say could have an effect. Anything. And now I sound like a selfish cow.
Like the guy that the speaker was talking about at Pring Street last night.. how he asked God "What am I meant to do?" Seriously.. unless I get hit by a car tomorrow, I reckon I've got a fair bit of living to do. So what am I meant to do? I'm so confused. Like, I have absolutely NO DOUBT that God is real, that He is moving within our group, our city, our country. But what can I do to show the world that? I'm just.. a Penny.
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Mon Jun 04, 2007 5:11 pm |
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yeah, mostly it was just us being reminded how much of an amazing person you are...
penny, one day you'll realise that you're not ephesian, you're not even a redshaw; you're a christian... |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 5:14 pm |
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Thanks elliot..
I hate this. You can't even see my face to see how much I mean it. |
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dosthecat
Joined: 10 Sep 2006
Posts: 2111
Location: Ippie, QLD
Mon Jun 04, 2007 5:29 pm |
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"I'm just... a Penny".
i'm sure others would agree with me... without your inspiration, i would've never wanted anything to do with the rest of the group. without that, i would've never gone to the camp. never wanted to feel something i'd never felt before, to be something i'd never been before, to be a new creation in christ. that september day would never have happened. i mightn't have gotten saved... i might still be a nothing, a stupid little thinks-he's-smart bag of hatred and bitterness.
you need to look at yourself, and if you do this for long enough you'd realise that by just being penny you're accomplishing so much... so i think if you wanted to do something extra-amazing, you should just continue being "just... a Penny" to the best of your ability. people will, and have been saved because of you. maybe you're not the one preaching the sermon, or leading in "the" prayer, but you've easily played as big a part as any of those.
you just don't realise it... |
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Powerkiss
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 176
Location: Second to the right! and straight on till morning!!
Mon Jun 04, 2007 5:45 pm |
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Couldn't have said it better myself. You Penny, is why I decided to give it all a try. You're a creative Penny. Your a joy to be around.
Short and Sweet. All things are possible in God (I think that's vikis email addy) So...ask him again.
But i'll be praying for you anyways.
_________________
Great news! I know what happened to Cinderella. She defeated the pirates. There was stabbing, slicing, torture, bleeding and they lived happily ever after!!! I LOVE HAPPY!! |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 5:47 pm |
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| Thank you guys.. so much.. |
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LastElf
Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 482
Location: Boovle
Mon Jun 04, 2007 7:07 pm |
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They couldn't have said it any better. If it wasn't for you I doubt I would be doing the things I am now. You're a big inspiration for me and my walk.
At the beginning of the year when you sent me that text at HomeLAN, hearing that made me want it more, hearing about everything at planetshakers, seeing you surrendering yourself at youth after "that September" when Shane and Josh came back, hearing what happened to you at church camp (earlier one). They've all built up and made me want so much more from God.
You are an inspiration! And you're still a damn fine Planetshaker, still shaking the planet  |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 7:17 pm |
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*waits*
edit: matt's cool, <3
Last edited by upendy on Mon Jul 30, 2007 9:04 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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LastElf
Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 482
Location: Boovle
Mon Jun 04, 2007 7:57 pm |
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Sorry, had to add something here
I know exactly what you mean with the low self-esteem about having an effect with people. I STILL feel that way at times, it's not a happy thought. I still think sometimes that I could disappear and no one will notice. I just want to say that you DO have an effect *as seen in above posts*. It may not be apparent on the surface, but it is there.
There's so much more I want to say, there really is, but I can't get the words out for it, expect more posts in the future .
And keep praying about direction, it will come eventually. |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 8:10 pm |
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| I have a problem with trust too. Like.. pretty much no one on this earth knows how my brain works, how I think about things (God knows, of course). Seriously. I don't know whats up, but.. I just find it really hard to trust anyone completely. I'm just always paranoid that my friends are planning some way to get rid of me, or ignore me, or something. Argh, I'm crazy. I'm going to go eat a sausage roll. |
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Kung-Fu
Joined: 13 Dec 2006
Posts: 997
Location: Eliza lives places.
Mon Jun 04, 2007 8:27 pm |
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I can speak for myself here. I will never desert you. You're an inspiring little tacker. I feel the way you do sometimes, like no one understands what's going on in my head - everyone jumps to accusations before I get a chance to explain what I'm thinking.
Would you like to have a chat about this tomorrow in person?
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LastElf
Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 482
Location: Boovle
Mon Jun 04, 2007 8:28 pm |
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I know we don't share the same thought patterns, and I probably will never know how your mind works, but I can offer advice based on my own experiences that sound like what you're going through. It may not be the same thing, but there's a chance you could get something out of it, or I could be completely off and be talking nonsense to you.
About the trust thing... I can't really compare with that, I'm a very trusting person most of the time, the closest I can get is what I said up a post about disappearing and being scared that people don't care about me. Words may not mean much, but I'm not against you, I love you too much to get rid of you out of my life. |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 8:28 pm |
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Ok.
You're a champion Eliza. Thanks. |
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upendy
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Mon Jun 04, 2007 8:29 pm |
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BRING BACK THE EDIT!!!
Thanks Matt. |
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Jr W
SilverSnake...
Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 3785
Location: Border City
Tue Jun 05, 2007 3:38 pm |
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Keep protesting
Seriously though Penny, you have a great influence on my life. More than you'll ever know.
_________________
"Knowledge is power, so everybody download some more eBooks" - WBB
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upendy
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Tue Jun 05, 2007 4:34 pm |
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*chants*
BRING BACK EDIT! BRING BACK EDIT!
I found a notepad that I wrote in right after camp and when Eliza got touched by God first. I lolled. If you want to hear it, post here. But yes, it's pretty funny because you can tell by my writing that I was like  !
Also, I found an old family album.
For those of you who have ever wondered what I looked like as a child, thats it. Aren't I adorable? Ha.. not. I remember I was a little brat.
Anyway, boring day. I bet I failed the Maths exam, hahaha. |
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LastElf
Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 482
Location: Boovle
Tue Jun 05, 2007 4:56 pm |
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That's just cute
And I'd like to see the notepad |
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Wilkins
Moderator
Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3452
Location: What?
Tue Jun 05, 2007 5:36 pm |
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BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! ROFL!
Awww.. how cute heh
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You used to be like my twin |
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Kung-Fu
Joined: 13 Dec 2006
Posts: 997
Location: Eliza lives places.
Tue Jun 05, 2007 6:54 pm |
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THE GATE!
I wanna see the journal!
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upendy
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Tue Jun 05, 2007 7:03 pm |
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Ok, ok. *retrieves*
Hope no one gets offended by what I say here. I wrote it just after we had that big conversation about the rain, lol. Remember? I'm kind of half journal writing and half talking to God, it's weird.
Seriously. How am I meant to write all of this down? The rain is coming, outside and inside, we're changing, being washed clean, so we can start all this again. Chris, gosh, what can I say about him! My respect and love has grown for him by about a bajillion. All since Saturday, things won't be the same. And Eliza! Wow, I don't even know her, yet she says she loves me! How great! What happened tonight was a miracle. What God did for her, how He showed her He loves her.. God, I love her too! Never even talked to her in real life, but I have so much respect for her!
Please God, get Eliza to youth!
They don't know how much it means for someone to say 'I love you' to me. But the feeling is definitely mutual, I love them so much. More than they could possibly know. I love you God. Thanks for saving me. Thanks that you're going to keep saving. Save our whole school; our whole planet.
HOLD ME, NEVER LET ME GO.
Penny.
Ha, aren't I a funny girl. |
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Kung-Fu
Joined: 13 Dec 2006
Posts: 997
Location: Eliza lives places.
Tue Jun 05, 2007 7:08 pm |
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AW YOU'RE SUCH A SWEETHEART!!!
I love you Penny!
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upendy
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Tue Jun 05, 2007 7:10 pm |
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I was high on the rain.
Can you tell? |
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LastElf
Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 482
Location: Boovle
Tue Jun 05, 2007 9:51 pm |
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| And it's all happening again. rain included |
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